So… What Kind of Coach Am I, Exactly? (And Which Version Do You Need?)
- Hélène Dumais
- Dec 2
- 9 min read
Updated: Dec 4
If you’ve known me for a while, you probably met me as your running coach or strength coach.
We talked about race goals, training plans, strength sessions, maybe nutrition and recovery. I gave you guidance, structure, feedback. I stood on the sidelines or next to you in the mountains, as the “coach” in the classic sport sense.
That kind of coaching is a big part of what I do — and I love it. We’ll keep doing this.
Over the last few years, I’ve completed my training and become a professional coach accredited by the International Coaching Federation (ICF). I’m the same Hélène you know; I’ve simply added another way of working with you.
In this post, I want to share what I mean by professional coaching and how it sits alongside the mentoring, consulting and training many of you already know, so you can better recognize what you want from me at different moments.
Our relationship isn’t changing; we’re putting clearer words on what already exists and opening up one more option if and when you want it. It’s really about clarity and options.
“Coach” in Training vs “Coach” in a Coaching Session
In sport, a coach typically:
Designs your training
Gives you feedback and cues
Teaches you skills
Tells you what to do (and what not to do)
Motivates you on the hard days
That’s mostly consulting, mentoring and training in a sport context — and it’s a powerful way to support performance.
Professional coaching, in the ICF sense, is different.
The ICF defines coaching as:
“Partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential.”
In simple terms:
Coaching is a conversation where you do the inner work, and I hold the space, ask powerful questions, and challenge you in service of what you want.
Instead of me giving you “the right answer,” we explore:
What do you really want?
What’s in the way — in your thinking, emotions, beliefs, behaviours?
What are your options?
Which choice feels aligned with who you are and who you’re becoming?
You leave not just with a plan, but with ownership. It’s your clarity, your decision, your strategy.
Is Professional Coaching the Same as Psychotherapy?
Sometimes clients say:
“Oh, you’re like my personal therapist.”
I understand the feeling — but professional coaching and psychotherapy are not the same.
Coaching (in the ICF sense)
Focus: present & future
Assumes: you are naturally creative, resourceful and whole
Aims: clarity, choices, aligned action, performance, meaning
Works on: goals, decisions, behaviours, identity, mindset
Psychotherapy / counseling
Often focuses: past & its impact now
Aims: healing, stabilisation, symptom relief
Works on: trauma, emotional wounds, deep patterns that affect daily functioning
A simple sport analogy: as your running coach, I work with you as a generally healthy athlete who wants to move better and perform better now and in the future. If you’re injured, I’ll refer you to a sports doctor or physical therapist who can assess, diagnose and treat. Sometimes you can keep training around the injury while you rehab; sometimes rehab has to come first.
It’s the same with coaching and psychotherapy. They can work side by side, and if something is affecting your basic well-being or daily functioning, psychotherapy becomes the priority for a while. Coaching is there to support your growth, performance and goals as you move forward.
What It Actually Feels Like to Be Coached
A good coaching session is like a focused, high-quality workout — for your brain and your life.
To get the most out of it, you want:
A controlled environment: no phone, no kids, no pets, no distractions
Your full brain available: present, curious, willing
A mindset of courage and honesty
At some point in the session, it’s very normal to hit a wall like:
“I don’t know.”
“My brain is tired.”
“What do you think I should do?”
“What would you do if you were me, Hélène?”
This is actually the interesting moment.
It’s a bit like coming to a fork in the trail.
One side is a wide, well-groomed path:
familiar, smooth, almost on autopilot
you don’t have to watch your footing
you can keep your phone in your hand, stay in your usual stories, tell yourself “it’s fine”
The other side is a narrow, wilder single track:
more roots, rocks, maybe some elevation
you have to slow down, look where you put your feet, breathe, pay attention
it asks more from you, but it’s also where the views usually are
When you’re at that fork, your brain naturally wants to save energy — that’s just being human. In that moment, you choose:
Stay on the easy, familiar path, or
Step onto the single track and do the work you came for.
Coaching is for people who are willing to take that single track at least some of the time, because what’s on the other side matters to them. That’s where the “Oh. I see it now.” moments live.
What Coaching Has Done in My Life — and Why I Keep Choosing It (Even When It’s Hard)
Let me take off the “explainer” hat for a moment and just tell you what this has done for me.
I’ve been receiving professional coaching since I was 23 years old (I’m 45 now). It changed my life. The depth, confidence and freedom I have in my intimate relationships, the big decisions I’ve made — moving countries, divorce, choosing my vision over what others thought I “should” do — and what I’ve accomplished as an athlete are all deeply rooted in using coaching technology again and again, especially when it was uncomfortable. What you don’t necessarily see from the outside is that my default setting isn’t fearless confidence; my go-to pattern is almost always self-doubt. Coaching didn’t erase it — it helped me keep making courageous decisions, on and off the trail, even when self-doubt was loud.
If you’re into sports, think about facing a brutal obstacle in an OCR race. You’re clear on your goal: finish the race. You’re stuck behind a 10-foot wall. You try, you fail, you slide back down, a little more tired, bruised and muddy each time. Part of you wants to walk away or disappear because other racers are watching and moving on. But you stay. You stand in front of that wall, feel the burn in your body and the sting in your ego, and you choose not to quit. You reset your grip, adjust your strategy, gather all your courage and you commit again. When you finally get over that wall, everything that follows is more intense: the inner pride of “I am this person,” the joy, the connection with others, the finish-line feeling, and the sense that new things are now possible that simply weren’t before that wall.
In coaching, it’s similar — except you are the obstacle. Your beliefs, fears, stories and behaviours are the wall. Once you can acknowledge that and take courage to do the work once, twice, many times, that “wall” goes from being a place you automatically avoid or go around to something you actually seek out. It becomes your training ground.
It’s like learning the barbell squat clean: at first you think about every single cue; with practice, the movement becomes embodied and you’re just excited to get under the bar. In coaching, with practice, when a challenging moment shows up, instead of shrinking away you actually get curious and a little excited, because you can’t wait to see what you’ll discover on the other side of that wall.
Can I Just Get Consulting and Still Reach My Goals?
Short answer: sometimes, yes.. but it’s not the same.
You can absolutely come to me for a consult, get a plan, go home, reflect on your own, and have an insight. In fact, I encourage that. I’m a big advocate for self-coaching.
Self-coaching is an edge in life. Elite professionals, elite athletes, top performers — they all train some form of it. It can be as simple as asking yourself:
“What challenging question would Hélène ask me right now — from the side of being on my team?”
And then actually sitting with it, honestly.
Self-coaching is also harder than being coached. Besides bold honesty, it requires discipline, a growth mindset, openness, courage, and curiosity. You’re basically the machine that created the code trying to break its own code. And there’s a limit to how far you can go with that on your own. You can catch patterns, question yourself, choose differently — but you can’t fully step outside your own blind spots, no matter how hard you try.
That’s where a coaching session with a professional coach accelerates and deepens the process:
We create a focused, distraction-free space.
I sit outside your story — I can see angles you can’t.
I don’t let you off the hook when it gets uncomfortable if it’s in service of your goal.
You can grow with consulting and self-reflection. Coaching is where you deliberately train that inner coach — with a partner.
The Bike Metaphor: Why Insight Feels Different
Think about learning to ride a bicycle.
A consultant might say:
“Put your weight here, look ahead, pedal at this cadence. Here’s the optimal way.”
A mentor might say:
“When I learned, I found it easier to start on a slight downhill and focus on one landmark. Here’s what worked for me.”
A trainer/teacher might say:
“Let’s practice: start, stop, balance drills; I’ll correct your position as you go.”
A coach will stand beside you and might ask:
“What helps you trust yourself as you wobble? What do you want to focus on right now to keep going instead of putting your foot down?”
And then… there’s that moment when you feel balance for the first time.
Nobody can give you that sensation. They can explain, demonstrate, encourage — but that exact click? You create it.
You can’t unlearn it. You don’t need someone to “remind” your body how to balance every single time. You own it.
That is what a coaching insight feels like. One way another ICF-accredited coach described it is:
“An insight is when nothing has changed, yet everything is different.”
It’s that click about who you are, what you want, or what’s been in your blind spot. I didn’t hand it to you. You stretched for it. That’s why it’s powerful and lasting.
Coaching vs Consulting, Mentoring and Training (In My World)
In the context of Hélène Performance, here’s how I distinguish my hats:
Coaching
Focus: You — your thinking, beliefs, emotions, decisions, identity.
Tools: questions, reflection, gentle challenge, connecting dots.
Outcome: clarity, new perspectives, aligned choices, sustainable change.
Consulting
Focus: the problem or project.
Tools: analysis, recommendations, plans, protocols.
Outcome: concrete “do this / don’t do that,” strategies, structures.
Mentoring
Focus: learning from my experience.
Tools: “Here’s what I’ve seen,” “Here’s what worked for me and others.”
Outcome: shortcuts, examples, confidence from someone who’s been there.
Training / Educating
Focus: skills and knowledge.
Tools: teaching, drills, feedback, explanations.
Outcome: better technique, stronger body, more understanding.
None of these is ‘better’ — they’re different tools for different moments.
One Question, Four Hats (A Practical Example)
Let’s take a very real question:
“Hélène, I’d like to explore what races I should do this upcoming season.”
Here’s how I might respond, depending on the hat you want:
Coach (professional coaching):
“What makes this season important for you? What would make it a success in your eyes? What are you craving — challenge, fun, confidence, something to rebuild? Beyond races, what do you want your life and energy to feel like this year?”
We might not name a single race in the first 20 minutes. We’re aiming for clarity about you first. The race list follows.
Consultant:
“Given your history, current fitness and injury context, here are 2–3 race combinations that make sense. This one is a stretch, this one is more conservative, this one balances both. Here’s how I’d structure your year.”
Here, I’m giving you options and a plan.
Mentor:
“When I was in a similar place, here’s how I chose my races and why. Here’s what I learned the hard way about stacking too many big events.”
Here, I’m sharing stories and lessons from my own journey.
Trainer/Educator:
“If you choose that 80–100k race, here’s what the weekly load looks like. Let’s check if this fits your life, work, and recovery capacity.”
Here, I help you understand the practical load and requirements.
Same question. Different hat. Different experience for you.
For You, If We Already Work Together
If we’re already working together — whether it’s been a few months or many years, and whether we’ve only met on Zoom or also shared races and real-life moments — I want you to hear this clearly:
If we began with running and strength, I remain your running and strength coach.
I am the person who cares about your goals, your health, your life, and your big crazy ideas.
And now, I also have this professional coaching hat that we can use more consciously when it serves you.
At the beginning of a session, I may ask you:
“Where would you like to start today — more from a coaching angle or more from a consulting angle?”
It can absolutely end up being a mix. We might move from coaching to consulting and back again in the same conversation. That’s normal.
Just know that when the conversation gets tough, it’s very human to want to slide back into consulting: “Just tell me what to do.” That’s okay.
Over time, I’ve learned that staying a bit longer on the “coaching” trail is usually where the biggest discoveries are. My invitation is simply this: when you notice that moment, pause, breathe, and ask yourself whether you’re willing to step onto the single track today.
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